


Even the Gods Need Rest

by Storyteller_of_the_Forest



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Brodinsons, Conversations, Family is family, Gen, Healing, Hope, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Loki (Marvel) is a Good Bro, No Slash, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Thor (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Thor (Marvel) is Not Stupid, Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:34:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24532381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storyteller_of_the_Forest/pseuds/Storyteller_of_the_Forest
Summary: In the aftermath of a mission gone wrong, Loki takes care of his brother and remembers a time not so long ago when Thor first returned and was afflicted with a mysterious tiredness. He reflects on how far they have come since then.(Part of my Tales of New Asgard series)
Relationships: Loki & Thor (Marvel)
Comments: 12
Kudos: 42





	Even the Gods Need Rest

**Author's Note:**

> Hello.
> 
> First, I sincerely apologize for the delay in responses to comments on my other fics. Trying to get back to some semblance of normal has disrupted every single one of my routines. I swear, I will respond to them. I'm still swamped with everything. Thank you so much for your patience. I really appreciate it.
> 
> Anyhow, this fic: basically, I watched a random movie and was disappointed in how bland and boring it was. The whole time it was on, I was thinking up the idea that would later become this fic. I just started writing it and voila. It became a super long one shot.
> 
> I highly recommend reading "Saving Thunder" first: this fic references that one (and it also references "The Dedicated Brother" too, but not as much).
> 
> Oh! There will be another one-shot coming this weekend. Yes, I actually thought of and wrote another long one shot. I'm not sure when I'll post it (probably Friday or Saturday).
> 
> I'm really looking forward to reading your reaction to this story. I'll do my best to respond to comments in a timely manner (I'm really sorry about the wait, readers).
> 
> I wish I had more to say, but I've been working all day and I'm feeling a bit worn out. Apologies.
> 
> REGULAR WARNINGS
> 
> Haven't seen Infinity War and am not going to see Infinity War (the Russos are terrible human beings. I don't want to hear about them or their god awful garbage).
> 
> I don't do romantic ships, especially not between family members. If you're into that kind of thing, go elsewhere (and don't tag my work with incest ships, please).
> 
> I'm still somewhat new to writing fics. So I apologize for any mistakes, mis-characterizations, formatting errors, or just any glaring errors. Please be gentle: writing fics is literally stress relief for me.
> 
> Kudos and comments are greatly appreciated. I don't own anything, obviously all characters and recognizable aspects belong to Marvel.
> 
> I hope you enjoy the story and thank you for reading :)

* * *

After he took on the mantle of leader of New Asgard, Thor dedicated himself to his people and taking care of them and their new home. It was a responsibility he shared with Loki, who worked diligently as his brother’s head advisor. The two of them worked well together, even when they disagreed.

Thor did occasionally meddle in Midgardian matters, much to Loki’s chagrin. His brother still felt a duty to the people of this planet. “The Midgardians have graciously agreed to share their home with us,” Thor once told him. “I must help the humans protect it.” (Loki had rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to his book, deciding not to bring up the way humans had treated Thor in the past).

Since SHIELD was technically an ally, which was solely Thor’s idea and doing, they would sometimes call upon the god of thunder to help with missions. It was rare and normally, Thor only helped in a consulting capacity. The new team of Avengers were the ones who threw themselves into danger and battles. Loki didn’t pay much attention to their exploits. They were so dreadfully dull and predictable.

Every now and again, Thor went into battle with them. Loki didn’t even try to talk him out of it, knowing such a discussion would be utterly futile. Thor protected people, he saved them. That was just who his brother was. Loki never worried either. All the Avengers foes were so ordinary, and his brother had much skill in battle. The trickster was more annoyed that he was left having to do deal with all the bureaucratic nonsense of leadership. He _hated_ having extra responsibility. Leave it to Thor to go out and have all the fun.

It was why he was taken off guard when Brunnhilde brought news that Thor had been wounded during a mission.

Loki had been in the middle of meeting with some cabinet member, possibly from transportation, who was droning on about something the trickster could not care less about. The trickster didn’t even attempt to conceal his boredom.

He glanced up to the door and at first, was ecstatic that someone had interrupted such a dull meeting. Then, Loki noticed the concerned expression Brunnhilde wore and his heart sunk. He immediately dismissed the meeting, assuring that it would be rescheduled and rose to meet the Valkyrie. All he could think was he had not heard from his brother since Thor left over two weeks ago. Normally when he was out of town, the god of thunder checked in regularly. Loki chalked up Thor’s silence to his being on a sensitive mission.

“What happened and how bad is it?” Loki asked Brunnhilde. She rubbed the side of her neck.

“SHIELD won’t give specifics,” she started. Loki scoffed and rolled his eyes. “They were given some bad intel, there was an ambush, and they lost some agents. Thor was wounded. He lost a lot of blood and there was some concern early on due to a head injury, but there doesn’t appear to be any lasting damage. Except he hasn’t spoken. The scans are clear, as are the tests they ran on him. He has been cleared to come home and will be here tomorrow.”

“Wonderful,” Loki said, grimly. “Will you be able to pick him up?”

Brunnhilde nodded. “Loki, Thor lost a few friends during that battle. Hill indicated he was taking it pretty hard.”

“Well, that’s my brother. He gets so attached to these mortals and they’re such fragile creatures,” Loki replied, though he was a little concerned. He wasn’t sure what his brother’s mental state would be like.

_*_

Thor arrived home the next evening, just after the sun set. Loki had ordered a meal his brother was partial to and was setting the table when he heard the front door open. He moved to the doorway and smiled when he saw his brother. The god of thunder was covered in numerous bandages and hobbled a little, but he was walking under his own power. The trickster approached as Thor bent down to take off his boots.

“Welcome home, brother,” Loki greeted. “It is good to have you back. You haven’t missed much, just the same boring nonsense. And you arrived just in time for—”

Loki was cut off when Thor suddenly embraced him fiercely, burying his face in Loki’s shoulder. Frowning, Loki wrapped his arms around his brother. Thor wasn’t shaking and there was no dampness to indicate tears. Yet he was holding the trickster tighter than he normally did, as if he were afraid of Loki vanishing. That was…odd. For a while, they just stood there, embracing.

“I’m glad you’re back. Leadership duties are so mind numbingly dull,” Loki said. He heard Thor sniffle quietly. “Are you hungry?”

He felt Thor shake his head. Loki gently cradled the back of his head, searching his mind for what else his brother could possibly want. Thor did enjoy talking, much to Loki’s chagrin. Heart-to-hearts were never his area of expertise. Still, perhaps that would helpful to his brother.

“Do you wish to speak of it? Of what happened?”

Thor shook his head again.

“Are you weary? I’m sure you’ve been looking forward to spending the night in your own bed. Midgardian hospital beds are so barbaric.”

Thor nodded and straightened up. Loki noticed the yellowing bruises on his face as well as the small cuts. Close up, Thor did look dreadful. The god of thunder smiled feebly at his brother, reaching out and gently squeezing his shoulder. He turned and limped to their room, stroking the small black cat as he passed by her.

Loki crossed his arms over his chest, considering what to do. After a moment, he turned and made his way back into the kitchen. He put a kettle on and opened the tea cabinet, picking out a blend Thor found pleasant. As he waited for the kettle, Loki started putting away the meal.

The kettle started whistling by the time he finished putting the food away. Loki quickly set about preparing two cups of tea. He put one mug on a saucer and moved easily through the kitchen to the main room, heading toward the bedroom.

Entering the bedroom, he noticed Thor had left a lamp on. He normally did on the rare occasions he went to sleep before Loki. The god of thunder was fast asleep in his bed, curled up under the covers. Loki placed both cups on the bedside table and moved out of the room. Noticing his brother’s bag in the front hall, Loki picked it up, carrying it back to the bedroom.

Entering the bedroom again, Loki put the bag on the dresser and opened the top flap. He put his brother’s clothes in the laundry basket and took out the few weapons Thor had brought with him, putting them away in the closet. Every now and again, he would glance over at Thor, hoping he would be awake. Alas, Thor remained asleep.

Once he finished putting everything away, Loki picked up the empty bag and brought it over to the closet, where he placed it among their other luggage. Straightening up, he glanced over at Thor again. The god of thunder was still sleeping peacefully. Moving to the bedside, Loki pulled the blankets down. His brother sighed softly in his sleep, but didn’t awaken. Examining the numerous bandages on his brother, the trickster placed his hand on his brother’s chest, reaching out with his seidr.

Thor was aching, but he wasn’t in overwhelming pain. While his wounds had been numerous and a few had been severe, he was well on his way to being fully healed. _Physically, anyway,_ Loki thought as he pulled his hand back.

Pulling the blankets back up, Loki sat on the bed, watching Thor. His mind drifted back to another time when his brother had slept deeply, shortly after arriving in New Asgard.

**

After resting for the entire day after Thor’s unexpected return, Loki awoke feeling well rested and ready to get to work. There was a small part of him that felt…strange, almost melancholy. He’d been looking after the Aesir and building this place for so long, it was what gave him purpose. Despite his best efforts, New Asgard had become part of him, his home. Now that Thor was back, it wasn’t Loki’s anymore. Thor would take over and it would be his responsibility. His people. His home.

Loki didn’t mind it, not if it meant his brother was back, but he couldn’t help but feel a certain amount of sadness.

He pushed it to the back of his mind, smiling as he carefully slipped out from under Thor’s arm. When the god of thunder grunted softly, Loki grabbed a pillow and maneuvered it into the place where he’d been. Thor immediately hugged the pillow in his sleep, holding it close. Loki rolled his eyes. Some things would never change.

Moving over to his dresser, Loki picked out his clothes for the day and made his way out of the bedroom and down the hall to the washroom. Closing the door behind him, he started planning the day. Even though he’d taken the rest of the week off, there was still so much to do. He would have to show Thor around and introduce him to the advisers (some of whom he would hopefully replace). The advisers would be pleased to see his brother again. They had never been fond of Loki. The feeling was more than mutual on Loki’s part.

When he finished showering and changing, Loki stepped out of the bathroom and made his way to the main room. He fully expected his brother to be waiting for him, probably with at least a million questions. The trickster grinned when he thought about Thor speaking again. He couldn’t wait to start needling him about his likely getting lost on the way to New Asgard.

Stepping out into the main room, Loki found it empty. He strode through it to the kitchen and his smile dropped a little. The kitchen was also empty. Swallowing his unease, Loki moved to the back door and looked out into the small garden. Thor wasn’t there either.

“Thor?” Loki called, looking around the space and moving over to the small stairway leading to the laundry area. His brother wasn’t there. _Were the fates really so cruel as to only allow me to have a single night with my brother?_ Loki thought as he hurried back into the main area and into the bedroom.

He almost fell to his knees in relief when he saw Thor still asleep in bed. Laughing at himself for his foolishness, Loki approached the bed and hopped up on it. Thor didn’t react at all, so Loki gripped his shoulder and shook him.

“Brother, it is morning,” Loki told him. Thor grunted in response. The trickster shook him a little harder, wondering why it was taking such effort to rouse his brother. He would have thought Thor would be chomping at the metaphorical bit to take on the role of leader of his people. Thor didn’t like waking up early, but it was well after sunrise. It was getting closer to afternoon.

Loki smirked mischievously, knowing exactly what would rouse his brother. “Would you like breakfast, brother?”

The promise of a good meal was something that would always get his brother springing out of bed. Thor loved eating, especially with family and friends. Good food was one of his favorite things in the world.

Thor remained asleep. Loki frowned and reached over, laying his hand upon Thor’s brow. He felt nothing out of the ordinary. Thor’s temperature felt normal.

“Thor? Thor, I need you to look at me for a moment,” Loki said as he shook him a bit more insistently, dread starting to settle upon him. Thor’s eyelid fluttered and after a few minutes, he managed to open his eye partway. Even that seemed a challenge. Very slowly, he turned his eye over to Loki. A feeble smile danced across his lips for a split second. He yawned.

“Morning, Loki,” Thor murmured, his eye drooping even more. Loki smiled.

“At last, you awaken. I am going to throw together a small breakfast. Is there anything in particular you had a taste for?”

Thor’s eye shut again and rubbed his face. “‘M not really hungry right now. Just want to sleep. Just a little while longer.”

Loki frowned, feeling more confused than concerned. This…wasn’t normal. _Well, coming back from death certainly isn’t normal either,_ he thought. Rising to his feet again, Loki opened his mouth to say something and then closed it again.

“I shall make breakfast and then come back to rouse you,” Loki said. Thor grunted in a way that sounded like agreement. He hugged the pillow closer to himself, and soon fell back asleep. Loki studied him for a moment more and then turned to leave the bedroom.

As he made their breakfast, Loki would glance over his shoulder, always hoping to see his brother wander into the kitchen. By the time he brought the food to the table, Thor still hadn’t made an appearance. Loki swallowed and went back to the bedroom, where his brother was still asleep. Thor wasn’t stretched out across the mattress like he normally did either. Instead, he was curled up in a tight ball, as though he were trying to make himself as small as possible.

Loki returned to his brother’s side and shook him again, trying to rouse him. Thor sluggishly opened his eye and looked over at Loki. The trickster tilted his head, noticing a deep sadness in his brother’s gaze. Even as Thor attempted to smile at him, Loki could see the sadness in his blue eye. Thor looked away.

“I’m so tired,” Thor yawned. “Loki, I…I don’t think I can get up without assistance.”

Assuming his brother was jesting, Loki snorted. “Much has changed after all, if the Mighty Thor relies on his ne’er-do-well brother for so mundane an action.”

Thor’s eye closed again and he turned his face into the pillow. Loki’s smile dropped and he ran a hand through his hair, suddenly uncomfortable. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to apologize. That simply wasn’t in his nature. Reaching out, he rested his hand on Thor’s shoulder. The god of thunder’s eye opened again and he looked over at the trickster.

“Come on, brother,” Loki said gently, helping Thor to sit up and wrapping his arm about his shoulders. The god of thunder slumped heavily against him, barely able to sit up. He sighed and rested his brow against Loki’s neck. Loki swallowed and helped Thor to his feet, taking most of his brother’s weight onto himself. Thor felt a little lighter than he once had, but Loki chalked that up to an undoubtedly long recovery.

Loki helped Thor to the washroom. After walking a little, Thor seemed slightly more awake. Loki left him in the washroom to shower and change his clothing. The trickster went back to the kitchen, where he had already set the table. He prepared two plates and sat at the table, waiting for Thor. His mind started racing as he thought about possible causes of his brother’s exhaustion.

A loud thump drew him out of his thoughts and Loki called out his brother’s name. When he received no response, he rose from his seat and hurried out to the main area and then the small hallway.

Loki found Thor on the ground in the hallway and his heart stopped for a moment. Rushing to his brother’s side, Loki breathed a sigh of relief when he easily found Thor’s pulse. Once again, he gripped his shoulder and shook the god of thunder. Thor mumbled irritably in his sleep and Loki sat back. _Well, I guess breakfast isn’t going to happen,_ he thought as he slid his arms under his brother and stood up, stumbling a bit. Irritation and concern were warring within the trickster as he tried to figure out what to do. Perhaps he should just let Thor rest another day.

As he began to make his way back to the bedroom, Loki was startled by his brother suddenly pawing at his shirt, attempting to grip it.

“No, d-don’t bring me…back,” Thor muttered. Loki’s breath caught in his chest as he looked to his brother, wondering if he was perhaps experiencing a bad dream. But Thor’s eye fluttered open, fixing on Loki. It took a few more attempts, but he finally managed to grab ahold of Loki’s shirt.

“I do not want to sleep any longer,” he grumbled. “I’m fine.”

Loki opened his mouth to respond but closed it again, nodding. Carefully, he lowered Thor to his feet. The god of thunder promptly almost fell back to the ground, saved only by Loki’s quick reflexes. When Loki tightly gripped his arm, he felt Thor stiffen briefly and draw in his breath sharply. He was so taken off guard by the small reaction that Loki almost let go again, but he managed to maintain his grip.

“Brother, I believe your body disagrees with your assessment,” Loki mentioned. “Please, allow me to help you back to bed.”

“No,” Thor said stubbornly, tiredly. “I can fight through this. I have endured far worse.”

Loki rolled his eyes. Norns, this was going to be a struggle. His pigheaded brother was going make himself ill all over again.

“Thor, you have been through an ordeal few have ever been through. There is no shame in resting. If that is what your body needs, that is what you must do,” Loki told him, doing his best to sound gentle. “Even Odin rested every now and again.”

 _Perhaps a little too much,_ Loki thought bitterly.

Thor slumped against him. “I am so tired of lying about in beds all day long. I see nothing but walls and it is like existing in a cage. I cannot live like that, bound with nothing but silence to keep me company.”

 _Such melodrama,_ Loki thought as he adjusted his grip on Thor slightly. He thought for a few moments about what to do. It would be easy to drag Thor back to bed and leave him there. However, knowing his brother, Thor would keep trying to achieve what he wanted. A smirk spread across Loki’s lips when he thought of something.

“Very well, if you do not wish to return to bed, will you at least allow me to bring you to the couch?” Loki asked. “I shall work in the main room today and the couch is under a window. If you are feeling up to eating, there is a small table in there that we can drag over.”

Thor looked over at him, hope dancing in his eye. “You would do that?”

“Of course,” Loki said. “Come. The couch is rather comfortable.”

Thor allowed Loki to help him over to the couch. As he got comfortable, Loki pulled down the blanket that he kept over the back, draping it over his brother.

“They told me you were dead.”

Loki frowned at the soft-spoken words, looking to Thor. The god of thunder had already closed his eye again. The trickster crouched down.

“Who? Who told you that?” Loki asked.

“The men,” Thor responded, obviously not completely awake.

“The ones who brought you back?”

The god of thunder nodded, a shudder going through his body. Loki reached out and laid a hand on his brother’s wrist. Part of him wanted to continue asking Thor about the experience (there was so much Loki wanted to know), but the trickster decided to hold back. He stood up again and walked back to the kitchen.

Moving to the refrigerator, Loki opened it and retrieved the fresh fruit Brunnhilde had dropped off the previous evening. Early the previous evening, the Valkyrie had gone to the shops and picked up some groceries for the Odinsons. She had brought back a vast selection of fresh produce. Deciding Thor should probably start with something light, Loki picked out a number of fruits and put them on the counter.

Retrieving a cutting board and a small bowl, Loki started cutting up the fruit. As he continued cutting, his mind wandered to what he knew about resurrections. They were exceedingly rare, only about a handful had ever happened. Most of which Loki knew hadn’t been actual resurrections, but rather mistaken conclusions. Come to think of it, he didn’t know of any truly successful resurrections. Current events notwithstanding.

Pausing in his cutting, Loki tapped the flat of the knife against the counter. To bring someone back from death successfully, one would need to consult a powerful necromancer. There certainly weren’t many of those in the galaxy. Loki himself only knew of one or two, neither of whom was anywhere near Midgard nor would likely visit this planet. Bringing someone back from death, a violent death in battle, was not something the Midgardians could have done on their own.

Scoffing, Loki turned his attention back to the fruit. What did it matter how his brother was brought back? Thor was alive. The means of how were completely irrelevant. Poking and prying into such a matter was something Thor would do. _If he were awake enough,_ Loki thought. Putting the knife in the sink, the trickster grabbed the bowl of fruit and retrieved a fork. He moved back out into the main area of the house.

Thor was still asleep on the couch, curled up under the blanket. Loki put the bowl of fruit on a small table and dragged that over. Sitting on the edge of the couch, he shook his brother’s shoulder.

“Thor? Thor, you need to wake up and eat something,” Loki told him. Thor moaned a little in protest. Smirking, Loki lowered the temperature of his hand and placed it on the side of Thor’s neck. The god of thunder barely flinched.

Something was very wrong.

“Thor!” Loki said sharply. Thor jolted, his eye fluttering and opening part way. He glanced over at Loki and then to the bowl. He mumbled an apology and tried to push himself up into a sitting position. After failing miserably a few times, Loki reached over and helped him. By the time he was sitting, he was half-asleep again. The trickster rolled his eyes. This was becoming unnecessarily difficult.

He watched as Thor attempted to pick up the fork, only to drop it. Another attempt produced the same result. Loki fully expected Thor to get frustrated, but the god of thunder only seemed to get more tired. Finally, he slumped back against the couch.

“I’m sorry, Loki,” he mumbled, sniffling. “I do not know what is wrong with me.”

Tears started running down his face and Thor scrubbed them away. Loki sighed and reached forward, taking ahold of the fork and the bowl of fruit.

“There is nothing wrong with you and there is no need to apologize to me,” Loki told him as he speared some fruit onto the fork. Taking ahold of Thor’s wrist, Loki placed the fork in his hand and helped him hold onto it.

Thor managed to eat a few forkfuls of fruit, nowhere near as much as Loki had hoped, but it was better than nothing. Loki placed the bowl within reaching distance and got to his feet, striding back into the kitchen where Brunnhilde had left some documents he needed to review.

By the time he’d re-entered the room, Thor was asleep again.

_*_

“No. No, please.”

Loki woke up and frowned, turning his head toward his brother. Thor was asleep, but his entire body was shaking. Tears were streaming down his face and his head was thrashing from side-to-side. Loki yawned and turned onto his side, figuring Thor would awaken from whatever bad dream he was experiencing soon enough.

“Please. Stop.”

Another whimper made Loki look over his shoulder. He’d never heard his brother beg before. The trickster briefly considered peeking into his brother’s memories. It wasn’t something he could do very well, but he could manage. However, he had no idea what Thor had experienced when he’d been brought back. Loki wasn’t sure he wanted to know what made his brother beg.

Loki let out a yelp when a large arm flopped over him, gripping him tightly. He could feel the tremors that wracked his brother’s body, could hear the ragged way Thor was breathing. The god of thunder was terrified.

“Please.”

Carefully maneuvering out of his brother’s grasp, Loki sat up and grabbed Thor’s shoulder, shaking him.

“Thor, wake up.”

It took a few minutes, but Thor finally awoke with a gasp. He seemed disoriented as he looked around the room, still trembling violently. He looked up at Loki, his brow creasing a little and a question on his face.

“You were having a nightmare,” Loki told him. Shame colored Thor’s expression and he dropped his gaze.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, turning onto his other side. Loki opened his mouth to respond and then closed it again, unsure what to say. Slowly, he lay back down and turned onto his side so that he was facing the wall. Glancing over at his brother again, Loki pulled the covers back up. He wanted to say something, to offer some kind of reassurance, but Loki was truly at a loss for what he could say.

Closing his eyes, the trickster fell asleep to the quiet sound of his brother sniffling.

_*_

The days passed slowly. Thor slept for hours on end and his sleep was troubled at night. Loki didn’t know what to do or say and it was frustrating him. He wanted to start talking to his brother about New Asgard, to start preparing Thor to take over the position Loki had held. Not to mention SHIELD was going to start breathing down his neck soon about the monthly questioning they insisted on subjecting the trickster to. Loki couldn’t leave his brother in so vulnerable a state, but he didn’t want to reveal Thor’s condition to SHIELD. Loki would never trust that organization the way his brother did.

One morning, Loki sat down beside his brother, who was asleep as usual. Thor hadn’t been able to eat much breakfast and Loki had to help him hold the utensils, as he had almost every day. Thor sniffed a little, shifting in his sleep

“Are you in any pain?” Loki asked softly, resting his hand on Thor’s shoulder. Thor’s eye slowly opened. He turned his face toward Loki, a watery smile briefly crossing his face. There was such melancholy to the expression, which bothered Loki.

“No,” Thor said around a yawn. “I’m just tired, brother.”

Loki frowned, his mind racing. He hated asking for help, but this was beyond his ability to treat. Something was wrong with his brother. Unease was starting to creep into his mind and the memory of Thor, mortally wounded and bleeding out in his arms, flashed through his mind. Loki had failed to save his brother then; he couldn’t fail this time.

“You have been sleeping for almost four days, Thor,” Loki told him gently. “Perhaps I should call a healer.”

A sudden iron grip on his hand startled Loki and he jumped. He looked to his brother, shocked to see Thor’s eye was wide open. The tiredness was still there, but more prominent was the fear. It was such naked fear, something he had never seen in Thor before. Perhaps something Thor had never experienced before.

“Don’t, please,” Thor’s plea drew Loki out of his thoughts. “I just need more rest, Loki. I promise, I will be fine in another few days.”

Loki stared at him, unsure what to say. Those damn Midgardian, those damn arrogant little ants. They were always so careless in everything they did. They played around with powerful forces and magic as if they were mere children’s toys. And now they had damaged his brother with their carelessness. Wonderful.

Realizing Thor was still watching him, still afraid, Loki gently squeezed the hand that still grasped his own. He nodded and rose to his feet, suddenly wanting to leave the room. He couldn’t handle this at the moment. The situation was not one he was equipped for.

“Well, it is nice to have some peace and quiet,” Loki said, trying to sound laidback and indifferent. “You must eat something, however. You have been missing too many meals, Thor. I won’t have you wasting away after miraculously returning to life.”

At his familiar tone, Thor seemed to relax. He slumped back on the couch, his eye already starting to close again.

“All right,” Thor yawned, nestling down again and closing his eye. Suddenly, the mighty god of thunder looked so vulnerable and alone. It pained Loki and he could feel warmth in his eyes. In a rare moment of gentleness, Loki tugged the blanket up more on Thor, smoothing it. He reached out to run a hand over his hair, like he’d seen Frigga do in the past, but hesitated. Thinking about what Thor might have endured, Loki pulled his hand back and straightened up.

“I shall awaken you when dinner is here,” he told Thor.

“Thank you, brother,” Thor mumbled, barely awake. Loki stood up and made his way to the kitchen, rubbing his palms together. He laid his hands on the smooth tabletop, closing his eyes. He could feel the tension gathering in his shoulders. Something was wrong with Thor and he didn’t want to see a healer. That severely limited their options. Loki could potentially force his brother to go, but in the state he was in, the trickster didn’t think that would be wise.

Loki sighed and pulled his phone out of his inside pocket, scrolling through his contacts until he found Brunnhilde’s. Swiftly composing a text and sending it, Loki replaced the phone and moved over to the stove. Opening one of the cabinets and pulling out the kettle, Loki brought it over to the sink, filling it with water.

As he set about making tea, he tried to figure out what could be causing Thor’s exhaustion. When Loki had arrived on Midgard, he’d slept well, but not for days. Then again, he had been in Thanos’ thrall. _I’ve also never been dead,_ he thought. As much as Loki hated to admit it, he was in uncharted territory.

An hour later, Brunnhilde dropped off their dinner. She stayed for a few minutes, sitting with Thor, who remained in a deep sleep. Loki could easily read the concern on her face.

“Let me know if you need anything else,” Brunnhilde told him as she rose to her feet. Loki nodded. “Have you brought him to see the healers?”

Loki shook his head. “Thor doesn’t wish to, not yet.”

“Loki—”

“Brunnhilde, I will convince him to go. Right now, he needs some time to adjust.”

Brunnhilde gave him a skeptical look, but nodded in agreement. They exchanged some words of parting and then she left. Loki went back into the kitchen and started putting the food out on the table. He fixed a plate for himself and for Thor. It was a stew, which would be easy enough for Thor to eat unassisted. Loki swiftly cut a few slices of bread and put a couple on Thor’s plate. The god of thunder wouldn’t be able to eat much, but he could eat. Pouring a glass of water, Loki stepped back and let out his breath.

Turning, Loki made his way into the main room, pausing to watch his brother. Thor was sleeping peacefully on the couch. Loki moved easily across the floor and put a hand on Thor’s shoulder, calling his name. It took a while, but Thor reluctantly woke up. He turned his eye up to his brother, smiling softly. It was not his usual warm, kind smile. It was forced and there was such a melancholy to it.

Seeing Thor struggling to sit up, Loki grasped his arm and helped him to stand, taking on most of the god of thunder’s weight. Adjusting his grip slightly, Loki led Thor into the kitchen and helped him to his seat. After making sure his brother was awake enough to remain seated on his own, Loki sat beside him.

Thor picked up a spoon, which shook in his hand, and started pushing around the stew. He looked so miserable it was depressing.

“Would you like me to tell you about New Asgard?” Loki asked. “We haven’t spoken much about it since your return.”

Thor perked up ever so slightly at the suggestion and looked over at his brother, nodding. Loki grinned and began to speak to his brother about the new home of the Aesir, pleased that Thor was awake enough to listen.

For the next couple hours, Thor listened intently to Loki speak. He didn’t smile, but there was such a look of pride on his face. Something about that warmed Loki’s heart. The trickster had never really given a damn about the opinions of others, or so he told himself. Truth be told, he had not built New Asgard out of pride or to be beloved or anything like that. He had done it to honor his brother’s memory.

Thor only managed a few bites of stew before exhaustion claimed him again. Loki helped him back to the bedroom.

“‘M proud of you, Loki,” Thor whispered as Loki pulled the covers up to his shoulders. “Of what you accomplished.”

Loki smiled faintly. “I’m glad your new home pleases you.”

“Yours too,” Thor mumbled, his brows briefly furrowed together. “Isn’t it?”

Loki cleared his throat. “Rest, brother. We shall speak more of New Asgard tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” Thor whispered, barely awake. “For keeping your word.”

_“Make this place your home and be at peace here,” Thor had said, blood dribbling out of the corner of his mouth. Despite the pain he was in, he smiled at Loki. He was suffering and still, his only thought was to comfort Loki._

Loki swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded, unable to speak. He placed a hand on his brother’s shoulder, squeezing gently.

“I shall return shortly. I’m just going to clean up,” Loki told him. Thor had already fallen asleep again, so Loki stood from the bed and started making his way out of the room. He hurried to the kitchen and started clearing the table, his mind turning back to how the Midgardians could have possibly brought his brother back. They hadn’t healed him, not based on what little he knew about his brother’s recovery in Wakanda. They had obviously cut more than a few corners, whatever they did. _Typical,_ Loki scoffed.

There was a possibility, one Loki didn’t even want to entertain. Not even humans would be so foolish.

After he finished cleaning up, Loki made his way back to the bedroom. He entered the room and was unsurprised to see Thor curled up tightly. Loki sighed and moved over to the closet, retrieving his nightclothes. He could hear Thor shifting in the bed, whimpering softly. Loki started making his way out of the room, quietly stepping out into the hall.

“No, no.”

Loki left the door open a crack, so he could hear if his brother was truly distressed. He started walking down the hall.

“You…you do not know the power. Don’t use the stone, please.”

The trickster froze, his eyes widening significantly. His heart started pounding and alarms went off in his head. Terror overcame him briefly, memories of the war of the Gauntlet and its aftermath flashing through his head. He twisted to look behind him, the clothing he was holding falling from his hands. A mix of terror and disbelief overcame the trickster. They wouldn’t. The stones had been destroyed. Surely the Midgardians hadn’t…

Loki turned and ran back to the bedroom, moving swiftly to the bed and shaking his brother.

“Thor! Thor, wake up!” he ordered, gripping his brother tightly. Loki was much louder than he intended, but he didn’t care. _Tell me they didn’t. Tell me they didn’t force you back to life like that. Tell me they didn’t subject you to an infinity stone._

Thor moaned softly, tremors wracking his body. Loki shook him even harder, not letting up until the god of thunder woke up. As usual, he was only half awake and now he appeared disoriented.

“Wha’s wrong? Wha- happened?” Thor slurred, looking around. Loki almost started interrogating his brother. He had to know. He needed to know so he could figure out what to do next. If Thor’s exhaustion was somehow connected to an infinity stone…that could lead to all sorts of unpleasant complications.

Then Loki looked at Thor. His brother was barely awake, but he looked anxious, undoubtedly sensing Loki’s own nervousness. The trickster forced himself to calm down and placed a hand on the side of Thor’s face, keeping the god of thunder focused on him.

“Brother, did the Midgardians use the soul stone to bring you back?” Loki asked as calmly as he could manage. Thor rolled onto his side, tears welling up in his eye. He didn’t need to answer. His reaction was all the answer Loki needed. The trickster hung his head, trying to maintain his composure.

The Midgardians had seen the damage the stones were capable of, they had fought against the one who abused them for his own heinous purposes. How could they turn around and the same to another, to one of their allies, one of their heroes? Another horrific thought wormed its way into his mind. Pieces started clicking into place, and yet there were still some things that didn’t make sense. The condition Thor had been in when brought to Wakanda. That he still lived was impossible. Unless…

Loki didn’t want to ask the question, didn’t want to know, yet he had to.

“Did they…did they use it more than once?” he asked softly. Thor sniffled and nodded. A lump formed in Loki’s throat. His brother had been subjected to the agony of the stone’s touch more than once. How many times had he been forced back to life in his broken body? Those damn mortals likely panicked and continually used the stone every time Thor took a turn for the worse. Shaking his head, Loki decided to focus on just the facts.

“How many times, Thor?”

For a long time, Thor was silent. He was curled up so tightly, his arms and legs protecting the vulnerable parts of his body.

“I cannot remember,” he finally whispered. Loki looked up. That wasn’t a lie. The trickster wasn’t surprised. Rage was starting to boil up in Loki. An all-consuming rage that overtook any kind of restraint he might have shown. He was sure flames were burning in his eyes. Loki’s hands balled up into fists on the blankets. Such rage needed an outlet and Loki knew exactly where to direct it.

“Who? Who brought you back, Thor?” Loki asked, dangerously calm. He was going to find that damn stone and destroy it once and for all. If any Midgardians were unwise enough to get in his way, that was their problem.

Alas, Thor shook his head and closed his eye. “I do not know.”

It was a lie, which made Loki bristle. He ground his teeth together, his anger briefly turning to his brother. Loki had to bite his tongue to prevent himself from snapping at Thor. He forced himself to remain calm. Perhaps his brother just didn’t want to revisit such memories right now. Perhaps Thor just wanted to sleep.

There were other ways Loki could get the answers he needed.

“All right,” he said. “I apologize for disturbing your rest. Go back to sleep.”

He stood from the bed and made his way out of the bedroom, shutting the door quietly behind him. Moving over to the couch, Loki sat on it cross legged. He waited patiently, tempering his rage. His impulsiveness had been detrimental in the past. He needed to be calm and collected in this quest. Loki needed to keep his wits about him.

When he felt calm enough, Loki slowly let out his breath and closed his eyes, allowing his consciousness to travel countless miles away. In a split second, he had crossed the ocean and stood inside a place he’d not been interested in seeing again.

In front of him, two men stood with their backs to him. Loki crossed his arms over his chest, watching them for a moment. They were pouring over an old tome.

“You are an arrogant fool as well as a charlatan,” Loki stated. Strange and Wong both turned at the trickster’s voice, staring at him.

“Loki Odinson, to what do we owe the pleasure?” Strange asked in his droll tone. Loki clenched his fists, already aggravated. He couldn’t believe he had to deal with this second-rate magician _again_.

“You let the damn Midgardians keep the stones? Have you completely lost your mind?” Loki snapped.

Strange sighed heavily and nodded to Wong, who took the tome and left the enormous room. Strange tapped his fingertips together as he turned back to the god of mischief.

“Believe it or not, I had no idea any of the stones were still intact after the battle,” he spoke calmly, which only further angered Loki. “I didn’t know what SHIELD was—”

“Oh spare me your mewling,” Loki growled with a dismissive wave of his hand. “I do not care about your excuses. I want to know where to find Fury.”

“Pardon?”

“My brother is unwell and if I’m to help him, I must find out more about what those damn Midgardians did to him. If anyone knows anything about SHIELD, it’s him. Unfortunately, I do not know how to reach him and he doesn’t stay in one place long enough to teleport to him.”

“And you think I’d know how to reach him?” Strange scoffed. “I haven’t spoken to Fury since he dropped me off back at the Sanctum after we left Thor in Wakanda.”

Loki resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Midgardians were so bloody useless.

“You’re part of the Avengers and yet you cannot reach the one who created your little group of misfits,” he said, frustration creeping into his tone. “Typical. Well, I have wasted my time it seems.”

“Have you reached out to Coulson?”

Loki closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. The only one he wanted to speak to less than Strange was the Midgardian who hated him more than anyone else. Honestly, humans were so sensitive and overreacted to everything.

“Perhaps you are aware of the history we have,” Loki mentioned snidely. “Or maybe not, since you mortals are incapable of communicating with each other. How you lot continue to survive eludes me.”

“I’m well aware of your actions during your first visit to this planet and I know Phil doesn’t care for you, with good reason,” Strange started, ignoring Loki’s derisive scoff. “However, I know he considers your brother a friend. He was close with all the Avengers, but he had a real fondness for Thor. He was one of Thor’s first friends, after his banishment.”

Loki glanced over at Strange, intrigued. It was true, there were certain humans that Thor held in favor and that strange man with the sad face was one of them.

“If anyone knows where Fury is or knows how to get in contact with him, it’s Phil Coulson. If you explain what happened to Thor and manage to not insult the man, then I think he would help you,” Strange concluded.

“And I’m sure he would just believe me,” Loki said sarcastically. “Even if our first encounter hadn’t been as…violent as it had been, I’m still the god of lies. Humans don’t tend to take me at my word.”

“Tell him to contact me and I’ll vouch for you. This one time,” Strange said. Loki arched an eyebrow.

“And what is the motive behind this generosity? I assume it comes with a price.”

Strange squinted at him. “There is no motive and no price. Your brother is a friend and ally. What was done to him was horrific and someone should answer for it. Thor did not deserve to be used like that. Citizens of this planet have rights and Thor’s were violated.”

Strange paused, calling a book to his hand, adding, “And the more you know about what happened, the better equipped you will be to help your brother recover.”

He paged through the book, stopping on a page and holding it out to Loki. Loki leaned forward, peering at the page. It was a picture of a helicarrier, not unlike the one they’d brought him onto.

“They’ve been doing repairs on that helicarrier at a SHIELD facility near Los Angeles. Based on the amount of times you hacked into their databases, I trust you know the location,” Strange said. Loki smirked. He did indeed know of one such location. He’d never been there physically, but their system had a very useful backdoor that was easy to hack into.

Not even bothering to say any words of parting to Strange, Loki disappeared as he sent his consciousness to the SHIELD facility. He swiftly cloaked his illusion from prying eyes and stepped into the hanger, staring up at the massive helicarrier. It was strange, seeing a ship like the one he’d been on so many years ago. He’d been such a different person at the time.

 _Such an eyesore,_ he thought with a face of disgust. Hearing chattering somewhere nearby, Loki strode toward it, soon happening upon two women in dark colored clothing.

Not overly interested in random humans, Loki passed by them as he continued deeper into the facility. These places were always so large and bland, a far cry from the majesty and splendor of Asgard.

Wandering around for a bit, Loki soon found himself in a mostly empty room that looked a little like a library. There were shelves of books and files. A few empty tables were off to one side and Loki’s eyes landed on a man in a dark suit with thinning brown hair. He swallowed, hearing a click in his throat. This was a bad idea. Oh, this was a _very_ bad idea.

Loki turned to leave but thought of how distressed his brother had been. The way Thor had looked at him, clung to him, with such terror in his eye. He thought of his brother sleeping for hours and hours on end, barely waking up enough to eat or drink. Thor couldn’t continue on like that. Dropping his head, Loki took a deep breath and turned back around, approaching the man in the dark suit.

Coulson was sitting by himself, focused on the file he was reading. Loki plastered on his most charming smile and stood across from the man.

“Agent Coulson! Fancy running into you here,” he greeted boisterously. Coulson flinched at the sudden loud voice, looking up from his file. When he saw Loki, his expression went completely blank. _Well that’s not good,_ Loki thought, his smile never faultering.

“I had heard you were among the living again,” Loki said as he clutched his hands behind his back, peering at the file. “You’re looking well, considering the last time I saw you, you were, ah…”

Loki trailed off, realizing his error. Coulson subtly raised an eyebrow, still expressionless. The trickster rubbed the back of his neck, gritting his teeth. This was going poorly. Raising his eyebrows, he craned his neck as he tried to peer at the open file.

“Up to anything interesting? Perhaps something you need some assistance with?”

Coulson closed the file without taking his eyes off Loki, his expression not changing. Plastering his smile back into place, Loki decided to just get right into it.

“I have come to ask a favor.”

“No,” Coulson said flatly as he put the file into his satchel.

“You haven’t even heard what I would ask.”

“I don’t need to. I won’t help you, Loki. Nothing you can say will change that,” Coulson said as he moved to stand up.

“What if it’s about Thor?” Loki asked. Coulson hesitated, looking suspiciously at the trickster. Loki rubbed his palms together, slowly letting out his breath.

“Perhaps you heard of my brother’s recent return to New Asgard,” Loki mentioned. Coulson nodded once. Loki took a moment to gather his thoughts, figuring out how to present his case.

“The war affected my brother deeply and bringing him back seems to have affected him similarly. If I’m to help him, I must find out what happened to him.”

“And I’m supposed to take you at your word? That you care about someone other than yourself?” Coulson scoffed and picked up his satchel. Something about that rankled Loki. How dare this Midgardian speak to him like that after what his organization did.

“Listen, human,” Loki snarled. “I don’t like you anymore than you like me. However, I know you claim to be a friend to my brother. My brother who gave his life for your kind and this planet. The organization you are loyal to meddled with forces beyond their control and damaged him in the process. The responsible parties will answer for that, once I’m through fixing whatever they broke.”

Coulson frowned. “What?”

Loki tilted his head a little, surprised. “You didn’t know.”

Coulson shook his head. “I don’t know anything about what happened to Thor. I just heard he had returned. I didn’t know how, I still don’t. That’s above my paygrade.”

Loki suddenly felt very tired. Midgardian bureaucracy was a tangled mess. “Look, I would not have approached you if I thought there was someone else I could get this information from. You’re the only one I can think of who might have what I’m looking for. My brother needs help and I cannot help him unless I know what was done. Thor always spoke highly of you and grieved your loss. He considers you one of his friends and I’m sure you feel similarly about him. Do this favor for him. Help me help him.”

“You’re the god of lies,” Coulson pointed out. “This could just be another story.”

“Call Strange, if you must. He will vouch for me,” Loki immediately replied. Coulson sighed and pulled out his phone, rising from his chair.

“Stay here,” he ordered as he pressed a button on the phone’s screen and stepped a few feet away. Loki looked around the enormous space, yawning. He drummed his fingers on the table. Smirking, he leaned forward and made the illusion rest his head on his hand. It had taken him ages to learn how to cast realistic illusions that wouldn’t dissipate doing such simple positions. Most sorcerers who could cast illusions could only stand rigidly as if they were made of stone. Loki could sit, stand, lay down, rub his hands together. He could even whistle when so inclined. And the trickster never missed an opportunity to show off.

Loki sat back when he noticed Coulson approaching, tucking the phone into an inner pocket of his jacket. He barely even glanced at Loki.

“So, did Strange confirm my intentions were pure?” Loki asked.

“He confirmed your story,” Coulson replied.

“Then you’ll help me,” Loki stated, unable to conceal the eagerness in his voice. To his shock, Coulson shook his head.

“I’m going to offer you some advice. If Thor is struggling, seek out a doctor or a therapist. You are not equipped to help him and will cause more harm if you try,” Coulson said. “The best thing you can do for Thor is get him someone who is qualified to help.”

He turned to leave, and Loki instantly sent his illusion to block his path, holding up a hand. He looked Coulson in the eye and could see the man was not thrilled with having to deal with him.

“Do you understand that Thanos wasn’t the only one who thirsted for the power of the infinity stones?” Loki tried, desperate. If he had to appeal to the humans ridiculous need to be a hero, he would. “As long as they’re still intact, your world is in danger. Using them is like sending up a beacon to every monster that’s out there, leading them right to this miserable little planet. Trust me, Thanos is far from the most dangerous enemy out there.”

Coulson gave him a dry look and stepped around Loki’s illusion, moving for the exit. Loki hurried after him and stepped in front of him again.

“They brought you back once. That was taxing on your body, was it not? It was agonizing and made you wish they had just let you rest in peace. You probably screamed and begged them to stop. That was only once.”

Coulson’s lips set in a thin straight line, his eyes narrowing at Loki. The one who had been responsible for his death in the first place. Loki knew he was treading on dangerous ground, but this was the only chance he had to get the information he desperately needed. If he failed, Loki didn’t even want to consider what that would mean for Thor.

“Whoever brought Thor back, did it multiple times. For what reason, I know not, but someone in your organization did that to him repeatedly, subjected him to that agony more than once.”

Warmth was gathering in his eyes and he was afraid. Loki was not like Thor. He didn’t know how to befriend people or how to earn back any sort of good will once it was lost. Coulson had absolutely no reason to help him and every reason to ignore him.

“Whatever they did, they hurt him somehow. Thor sleeps for hours on end. He can barely rouse himself enough to eat or drink. There have been numerous times I have found him on the floor after he attempted some mundane task, sometimes as simple as just changing his clothing. I fear my brother’s time is running out and if I do not get the answers about what’s afflicting him, your planet shall lose one of its mightiest defenders all over again. This is not something an ordinary Midgardian healer can help with. You claim to be a friend and ally to my brother. Thor counts you among his closest friends. Do not turn your back on him in his hour of need.”

Coulson remained silent, though his expression had softened slightly. He was watching Loki, waiting.

“Agent Coulson, I have had plenty of opportunity to partake in mischief, to cause further harm to your planet. I haven’t done so, nor will I. All I want is to help my brother. I am here on my brother’s behalf. You are not helping me, you are helping Thor. Do you not think he would do the same for you?”

The Midgardian stood there, his expression conflicted.

“Please?” Loki added reluctantly. How he hated begging. It was beneath him. Loki prided himself on being self-reliant. Being in a position where he felt desperation was uncomfortable and infuriating. The trickster didn’t like it all.

For a while, there was complete silence. It felt like an eternity to Loki. He dropped his head, already trying to think of anything else he could do for Thor. Coulson would never help him, not after the unpleasantness with the staff.

“What do you need?”

Loki looked up, stunned. Coulson watched him, expectantly. The trickster was so taken off guard it took him a short time to remember what exactly he needed.

“Fury, I need to know where to find him,” Loki stated.

Coulson raised an eyebrow, the skepticism returning to his expression. The dark-haired god resisted fidgeting anxiously.

“Fury and Ms. Hill brought my brother to Wakanda to heal,” Loki explained. “If anyone knows what happened to my brother and the responsible parties, it will be Fury.”

Coulson pulled out his phone, scrolling through it a bit. Normally, Loki would have tried to peer over the man’s shoulder, hopefully gleaning useful tidbits of information. However, he remained where he was and just looked around at their surroundings.

“There’s a New York office he frequents,” Coulson mentioned, showing Loki the screen of his phone. “It’s where SHIELD keeps most of its archives.”

Loki swallowed and nodded, knowing where the location was that Coulson spoke of. Roughly. Peering at the picture of the screen, Loki saw he was correct in his assumption. It was a rather ordinary building, nothing about it stood out and it had even foregone the ridiculous SHIELD symbol.

“I spoke to him earlier this morning and that’s where he is. He’ll be there until the end of the week. After that, you’re on your own,” Coulson told him, sliding his phone back into his pocket. Loki nodded and was about to disappear but hesitated. He looked to Coulson, who glanced briefly at his watch and then moved to leave.

“Thank you,” Loki whispered, dropping his eyes to his feet. Coulson nodded once and stepped around Loki, exiting the large space. Loki closed his eyes as he sent his consciousness to Fury’s location.

_*_

The day after Loki met with Fury and Hill, he stayed home with Thor as he had done since Thor’s return. His brother needed someone with him constantly and Loki refused to let anyone else see Thor in such a state. Embarrassing Thor when he was awake was sport, it was fun. Embarrassing him while in this state wouldn’t be fun.

Especially not after what Loki had just learned.

Loki awoke shortly after the sun rose. Thor was still curled up next to him, asleep. In the soft morning light, his brother looked so peaceful and unburdened. The trickster carefully sat up in bed, pulling a knee up to his chest and resting his chin on it.

Looking back on it, the fear in Thor’s eye when Loki suggested getting a healer, the dark-haired god recognized it. That blatant terror, something he himself had learned to suppress over the years. Something he’d learned at Thanos’ merciless hand. It was a fear experienced by those who had endured and survived seemingly endless mistreatment, cruelty that seemed like it would never end.

It was a tool Loki had learned how to use during his time in Thanos’ thrall. And he had always had a malicious streak.

Yet even he could never do what the humans had done to his brother.

Loki’s green eyes wandered over to his brother. He didn’t want it to be true. It couldn’t be true. It wasn’t. It didn’t happen.

Thor sighed in his sleep and turned his face more towards the pillow. _How long did they deprive him of rest? Did they even give his wounds a chance to heal before…?_

No, it wasn’t true.

Loki needed to convince himself that it was impossible. Thor was too strong to be tortured, too beloved, too protected. Nobody wanted to harm his brother in such a way. Thor had friends, shieldbrothers, who would never allow such a thing to happen. It was impossible. It didn’t happen.

_But it did. You know it did._

Loki put his head in his hand. Norns, he was not equipped to deal with this. For all his power and magic, the trickster had nothing to offer his brother. No way to help him heal from such an ordeal.

As if on cue, Thor started whimpering and shaking. Loki stared at him, nervous. If he was having a nightmare, should Loki do something? What could he do?

“Loki?” Thor cried, one shaking hand reaching out. “Please do not harm my brother. Please.”

Loki stared at his hand and then looked to Thor’s face. Holding him the previous night had allowed Thor to sleep peacefully. Perhaps a similar gesture would suffice in this situation. Carefully, hesitantly, Loki reached out and touched Thor’s hand. He looked to Thor’s face, noticing his brother seemed a little less agitated. Swallowing, Loki interlaced his fingers with his brother’s, holding his hand.

At the simple touch, Thor settled down. Even more surprising, his eyelid fluttered and opened. Thor looked to their clasped hands and smiled.

“Good morning, brother,” Loki said gently. Thor mumbled something that sounded like a greeting, even as he sunk back into bed. Loki laid down beside him, resting his head on the pillow. It struck him that he didn’t really know how to speak with Thor after learning of his being tortured. He didn’t wish to upset him, but he didn’t think Thor would appreciate being coddled either.

“Do you not have,” Thor paused and yawned. “Matters to attend to, regarding New Asgard?”

Loki shook his head. “Not today. I am going to continue working from home for the time being. If a matter needs my attention, Korg or Miek shall run it here.”

A small smile danced over Thor’s lips. Loki grinned.

“Do you like when I stay here with you?” the trickster asked. His brother nodded. “Hoping to keep me from getting into mischief?”

“No, nothing like that. You are good company and we have spent so many years apart. I missed you greatly, Loki,” Thor told him tiredly. “I enjoy whatever time I can spend with you.”

Loki looked to their clasped hands, gently squeezing his brother’s. Perhaps…perhaps he should just ask.

“Thor,” Loki paused, trying to figure out what words to use. “Is there something I can do to make you more comfortable? To ease the burdens you carry?”

Thor opened his eye and looked at his brother, curious and a little confused. “I’m afraid I do not understand.”

 _Nor do I,_ Loki thought dryly. Noticing his brother was already half asleep again, Loki shook his head.

“Never mind. It can wait,” he told Thor. “We can speak about it when you are more awake.”

Thor nodded and Loki wrapped his arms around him again, allowing him to drift off safely wrapped in Loki’s arms. Loki watched him, suddenly feeling an inexplicable calm come over him. It wasn’t so difficult, especially not when Thor was an open book. All Loki had to do was talk to him. The trickster abhorred those sorts of conversation, discussing feelings was pointless, but in this case, Loki was willing to try it.

“Whatever helps you heal, I shall do,” Loki quietly promised Thor, leaning forward and resting his brow against Thor’s. “The mad titan shall not claim any victory over us. You will not lose, Thor.”

Thor remained asleep. Loki held him a little closer and allowed his own eyes to close, drifting off into an easy sleep.

**

Loki placed his mug on the bedside table, glancing over to where Thor was still sleeping. They had come such a long way since those early days. Stretching out his lean body on the bed next to Thor, Loki smirked as the god of thunder instinctively scooted back a little to make room for his brother. Slowly, Thor’s eye fluttered open and he looked over at Loki.

“I made you tea,” Loki said softly. Sometimes his brother was reluctant to speak when he was experiencing a migraine, so Loki decided to play it safe and modulate his voice. Thor closed his eye briefly and then pushed himself up to a seated position. Loki did the same and reached over to the bedside table, lifting the still full mug and handing it to his brother.

Thor accepted the mug, nodding gratefully to his brother. He sipped the hot liquid, closed his eye, and leaned his head back. Loki mirrored his position, watching his brother. He was a little concerned about Thor, but the trickster wasn’t one to sit around helplessly, fretting.

“You do not have to tell me about what happened if you’re not ready to do so, Thor,” Loki told him, drawing the god of thunder’s attention. “I suggest speaking to your ridiculous friend with the metal wings at some point, but it’s entirely up to you how much you wish to speak and when. The path you walk is yours, but it is not one you need to walk alone.”

Thor sniffled and looked down at his tea, his face twisting briefly in pain. When he looked back to Loki, tears glistened in his eye. Loki leaned forward and rested his brow against Thor’s, closing his eyes.

“If ever you wish to tell me about what happened, I shall listen, brother. If you do not wish to confide in me, that is also okay. Know that I’m always here, ready to face whatever challenges lay before you.”

Thor sighed softly, the tension leaving his body.

“Thank you,” he whispered almost silently. Loki grinned a little and nodded, leaning back. Thor sat back against the headboard and continued sipping his tea. His gaze became distant. Loki sat silently beside him, waiting.

“We were so close to completing the mission,” Thor said quietly, shaking his head. “We had safely evacuated the one they were targeting, a mere child. The next objective was to evacuate the rest of the civilians from the area, out of the active battlefield, what was once a pleasant village.”

Thor paused, looking down into the lingering remnants of his tea. He handed the empty mug to Loki, who placed it back on the nightside table.

“Earth First was there, unbeknownst to us. They…they opened fire on the civilians,” Thor told his brother. “I watched innocent men, women, and children fall. I heard the screams of the wounded, of the grieving parents, from where I was holding ground across the bridge. I ran towards it.”

Thor paused, swiping at his eye. Loki waited patiently. While there was a faint trace of annoyance at his brother still insisting on running straight into danger, he was used to it. Thor was a hero. Heroes ran towards the danger, in order to help. He interlaced his fingers together, watching the god of thunder.

“I was struck by a hidden shooter. My leg and my side,” Thor said. “I know SHIELD didn’t tell you much.”

“Well, they’re hardly ever forthcoming, least of all with me. Perhaps not surprising considering our history,” Loki replied with a subtle grin. A watery smile danced across Thor’s lips.

“I was unable to rise and barely managed to drag myself to cover,” he continued, sighing softly as he leaned back. “I could only hit some of the remaining combatants with my lightning as I waited for help. I saw the bodies around me, innocent Midgardians who had gotten caught in the crossfire. They were the last sight I saw before I was struck with another bullet. The warmth of my blood spilling out was the last thing I felt. My last thoughts were of you and Brunnhilde here in New Asgard, how much I wanted to see both of you again. How much I wished to see my home again.”

Thor paused, leaning a little closer to Loki so their shoulders were touching. The trickster pressed his shoulder against Thor’s, allowing the god of thunder to take comfort in his nearness. He knew Thor often needed physical contact to settle himself or, when he had a migraine, to focus on something other than his discomfort. Loki had grown used to it and almost instinctively leaned into it.

“When I next awoke, I was in a great deal of pain. Yet all I could think about was all those bodies on the bridge. The agents who had fallen while attempting to protect the civilians. Many of them had siblings who they will never see again, and my heart grieves for their families. But mostly, I wanted to see you, just to know you were okay. I knew you were safe here in Asgard, but…I was still worried.”

Thor dropped his gaze and sniffled.

“Why did you not call me? Once you woke up?” Loki asked. He was concerned about his brother feeling distressed and hiding it. Thor was quiet for a bit, his brow furrowing as he considered the question.

“I do not know. Perhaps because I couldn’t bear to speak to anyone right away,” Thor said softly, obviously choosing his words carefully. “Perhaps because I was imagining what would have happened had you received that call from SHIELD if I had fallen during that mission. I know you are often uneasy when I go out on such trips.”

“Your decisions are your own, Thor. I really don’t—”

“It’s not about that, Loki. If either one of us fell, it would hurt the other. Deeply,” Thor interrupted. “I am more likely to be the one who would fall due to how often I travel and partake in dangerous excursions.”

“There’s always the option of not being at SHIELD’s beck and call,” Loki pointed out.

“You know that’s not an option for me,” Thor said. The statement hurt more than Loki anticipated it could. His immediate instinct was to make a cutting remark, something to hurt Thor similarly to how the god of thunder had hurt him. But Loki bit his tongue. There just wasn’t a point in arguing the matter. Thor was always going to be Thor.

Thor shook his head, a fondness twinkling in his eye.

“I love this world. I developed a fondness for it during my banishment, and it grew into a love, of the planet and the people who inhabit it. And now, it’s our home. I love that this planet is our home. I have a duty to protect this world, as I had a duty to Asgard. I cannot bear when humans are hurt. They have such short lives. To have such little time cut short, it’s cruel.”

“Even you cannot save everyone, brother,” Loki said. Thor smiled a faint sad smile.

“No, I cannot. But I can save some.”

“And get riddled with bullets in the process,” Loki replied snarkily. Thor looked over at him, studying his face for a moment.

“I’m sorry I worried you, brother,” Thor told him, rubbing his brow.

“You did not,” Loki insisted stubbornly, glancing over at Thor. “When did the migraine start?”

“Shortly before I was discharged,” Thor told him.

“How bad is the pain?”

“Not very. There are some auras around lights, I experienced some vertigo earlier, there is a little pressure in my head but nothing unbearable. It is mild, thankfully. I imagine it shall clear up by tomorrow afternoon, the day after at the latest.”

Loki reached over and lightly laid his fingertips on Thor’s temple, green light pulsing beneath them. While he couldn’t relieve all the discomfort from the migraine, he’d learned how to lessen the pain and discomfort his brother experienced. Thor sighed softly and leaned into the touch, closing his eye.

“Loki?”

“Hmmm?”

“Would you be okay? If I did fall in defense of this planet,” Thor asked carefully. Loki glanced at him briefly before refocusing on relieving the pain.

“Perhaps you should increase your practice and sparring with the Valkyrie if you are so concerned about such matters,” Loki suggested. “Your warrior abilities have become noticeably rusty.”

“Hey,” Thor protested softly, obviously offended. Loki smirked.

“I’m just stating the obvious, brother.”

Thor studied him for a moment. “You did not answer my question. Would you be okay if I fell in battle?”

“Again?”

“Loki.”

Loki dropped his hand and reached for his mug on the night table. “I would have to be. Who else would be left to run New Asgard?”

Thor gently grasped Loki’s wrist and drawing his brother’s attention. “Would you be okay?”

“Would you?” Loki asked, feeling suddenly defensive. “Neither of us are without enemies. We do not lead safe lives, no matter where we are.”

Thor sat back, looking very tired. “I’m sorry, brother. It was an unfair question. I worry about things sometimes. Do you not ever worry about the future?”

Loki shook his head. “No. I do not tend to think about the future that way. Worrying about something that has not happened and may never happen seems rather pointless to me.”

For a while, they sat in a comfortable silence. Loki closed his eyes and leaned back, running through the tasks he had to do the next day. Thor needed some time to rest and finish recovering, whether he was willing to admit it or not. That meant his duties would fall to Loki for the time being.

“So much bloodshed, so many fallen,” Thor said softly. Loki opened his eyes and looked over at him. The god of thunder seemed a little dazed. _And you were very nearly among them,_ Loki thought.

“I cannot imagine losing you again, Loki. I don’t fear it as much anymore, but when we are separated, sometimes the fear is almost overwhelming,” Thor confessed. “I do not know what I would do without you.”

“Rest assured, it’s unlikely you shall ever find out,” Loki replied softly, grinning softly. Thor sniffled and looked over at him. The trickster was entirely unsurprised when he felt his brother’s large arms wrap around him in a firm embrace. Rolling his eyes up to the ceiling, Loki embraced Thor. His brother was so absurdly sentimental.

Thor turned his head to kiss Loki’s temple, before burying his face in his brother’s hair. “Thank you, Loki.”

Warmth briefly gathered in Loki’s eyes and he tightened his embrace slightly. “Thank you for coming back, Thor.”

Thor nodded before leaning his head against Loki’s.

“Are you feeling up to eating? I can call Brunnhilde and Bruce. The four of us can have a pleasant meal together.”

Thor glanced over at the clock. “Is it not a little late?”

Loki shrugged. “Eh, our friends keep strange hours and I’m feeling rather peckish.”

Thor smiled faintly. “I could eat a little. But Loki, do not wake them up. If they are asleep, let them rest.”

“You have my word,” Loki promised with a wide grin. Thor raised an eyebrow as Loki turned away, pulling out his phone.

An hour later, the four of them were at the table, enjoying a quiet meal together. Though there wasn’t much conversation, their smiles came easy. Loki glanced over at his brother and was pleased to see Thor looked relaxed and happy. He leaned back in his chair, watching as Thor and Bruce discussed something. Bruce was much more animated than he normally was and Thor seemed to be hanging on his every word.

“You seem pleased with yourself,” Brunnhilde observed from where she sat next to Loki.

“My brother is feeling better,” Loki replied. “Having a meal with friends is good for him.”

“And the big guy’s okay? He didn’t speak a word the entire ride home.”

“He will be okay,” Loki replied. “We spoke. Thor carries things with him, but he’s learning how to do so without overwhelming himself. I doubt he shall ever forget what happened on that bridge, but he will move past it given time.”

“You know, when you’re responsible, it’s a little unnerving,” Brunnhilde teased. Loki raised an eyebrow as he looked over at her. She smirked as she speared some of the food on her plate with a fork.

“He heals because he has you, you know,” she mentioned before bringing the fork to her mouth and thoughtfully chewing on her food. Swallowing, she continued, “I know you like to insist he’d do so anyway and perhaps he would, but not as fast and not as completely. You are two faces of a coin. Deny it all you want, Lackey, but you care about Thor and that love is what helps him recover. It’s actually incredibly sweet.”

Loki picked up his glass of wine and sipped it. “My brother and I are resilient, but Thor sometimes needs to be reminded of it.”

The Valkyrie smiled knowingly and turned her attention back to her food. Loki looked back to his brother. Thor glanced over at him and smiled knowingly, dipping his head. Loki raised his glass before bringing it to his lips again. It was a very good night.

**_The End_ **


End file.
